There is a too wide, well spread wrong idea that women might be more attracted with what are being called “bad boys” instead of the “nice guys”. I’ve read a lot and seen plenty of videos on internet where the basic idea was that the man should act like an asshole if he wants to get a woman. If he doesn’t want to be taken as a fool.
In my opinion, this has to be a misunderstanding. A big one.
First of all, there is a huge difference between a really bad behaved man, with no manners or respect towards any woman or even himself and the guy with a strong personality and determined, the guy who knows what and when he wants something from a woman and goes to get it, but not by using all sorts of passive or active aggressive ways like a freak control that he is, but by standing for his feelings and heart.
Assuming the fact that the woman might refuse him, but being willing to take that risk, to go with the flow!
That’s attractive to me! That’s appealing to me! That’s what intrigues me! That makes me say, after analyzing also other criteria already mentioned in a previous article that “wow, this guy MIGHT be a keeper!”.
Second of all, no intelligent woman would take a man as a fool for expressing his feelings. She could in the worse case scenario refuse him, but for sure in a very kind way.
I don’t think men realize one thing: intelligent women are kind even if men acted like some stupid, spoiled children, but it’s because they want to be that way. We choose to be that way. There is no “aaaa it works… I let her wait for me…I didn’t answer to her phone call and look, she contacted me first….” and all sorts of silly games like those.
No! A BIG NO! Not in the intelligent women’s case. Someone should also pay attention to the difference between smart women and intelligent ones. There are smart women and that’s it, cold like stones, but there are intelligent women who can see through your acts and that’s the reason they decide to be or not to still be kind to you.
I have some examples of men who wrongly thought that by being passive aggressive and strong on their wrong, egotistical position, they could “get me”. They all had in the end a surprise from my side. Because one day I just left them THERE. In that dark place where the ego and mind took them. THERE…away from their heart. THERE… away from the light of their own soul.
All they got was my attention and that also given from time to time. In the past I was confused when a man was acting against what he would have just said or viceversa. I hurt a lot because of that. Pretty late I understood that that was not love, but emotional abuse followed by a sexual obsession from their side. In time I’ve learned how to deal with that kind of treatment and behavior.
Those are indeed bad boys and I must say: it’s nothing attractive to them. I look at them, I say to myself “Another one trapped in his ego”, I accept them just as they are, but I will not build anything with them. Unless they decide to be kind and act like real, emotional mature men, I don’t make any step towards them.
As simple as that! 🙂