Love is not for all… it is just not… it’s extremely hard to get to the point to accept and want another just as he/she is, with all your body, mind and soul… it’s hard to let yourself go with this flow that seems to drown you exactly when you would think that everything is perfect and nothing could go wrong. Love is unpredictable and I think this is what scares most of us… it could last or not, it could be for a lifetime or not, it could be only an illusion or it could be the reality of your soul, one that could be in permanent conflict with your mind or body…
If you ask me, love is a one way ticket for a train that might go nowhere and sometimes apparently to no real land… not all of us have the courage to climb in and take the risk to leave everything behind, all the daily comfort and lack of complications, to really want to work hard with yourself, to have patience with the other one, to transform each other and grow up together, to go hand in hand through life… this why, the best strategy is to let it go… watch it slowly how it goes away, feeling sorry, but safe… and maybe to climb in another train with a known destination, nice traveling conditions, and even superficial, still with a good company with whom you spend your traveling time having small talks, paying bills and sometimes raising children… You feel no passion, no real love, but you are safe… you don’t miss, you don’t dream, you don’t suffer, you feel no pain…
“Summer romances end for all kinds of reasons. But when all is said and done, they have one thing in common: They are shooting stars-a spectacular moment of light in the heavens, a fleeting glimpse of eternity. And in a flash, they’re gone.”
They say life is not really a movie and yet I’d say mine looks like one… sometimes drama, sometimes comedy, but always intense, full of passion in everything I do, feel and live… in time, the scars became more and more obvious on my fragile body, and not so obvious on my soul, but each time I look at them I feel proud and I smile exactly like a great warrior who fought and survived in the biggest war of life: LOVE.
And even if “I am no one special, just a common” woman “with common thoughts”, and even if “I’ve led a common life” and “there are no monuments dedicated to me, and my name will soon be forgotten”, “in one respect, I’ve succeeded as gloriously as anyone who ever lived. I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul, and for me, that has always been enough.”
And surprisingly… at my age of almost 32 years old, I still have the childish believe that “love can do anything we want it to”, but when not wanted because of the awful fear of suffering, of being hurt, of not having a clear destination, of the risk of realizing one day that you’ve been just a naive dreamer, running after an illusion, it ends before it even starts and all you can say to him/her is that:
“I couldn’t sleep last night because I know that it’s over between us. I’m not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I’ll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I hope to give to you forever.
I love you. I’ll be seeing you.”– The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks