New year resolution

For the first time in many, many, many years I didn’t plan anything major for this year. I have no list with specific objectives, no special desires.

I just AM.

It is a weird feeling, I am telling you. I always had the feeling in the past that the year went by so fast, but not this new year apparently. Every single day and hour seem like a sweet sunshine touching my face. They seem longer too. And I realize now that it’s quite a challenge to just BE.

All of the sudden, the mind is quiet and besides a daily wish and prey for health and showing gratitude for everything that I have in my life, I don’t do much. I don’t plan much. A trip here and there, but nothing major like building a house, changing jobs, have the perfect relationship, perfect life etc… no, no one is perfect, but to be honest this is the first year when I let it be NOT perfect. And suddenly my mind got quiet and days feel longer and somehow easier.

I guess it’s nice to have some quiet in our mind from time to time…it helps us appreciate more what we have.

But that depends on our ability to just BE. The rest is just a plan= work= energy=…= dust in the wind.

From time to time, we should just BE.

Loveheimer

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Snowflakes in the night

“- For some reason the first snowflakes took me by surprise this year. Don’t really know why. It is cold for quite sometimes, so it’s kind of making sense. It’s nature. It’s the cycle of life: spring, summer, autumn, winter and the cycle repeats itself till the end.

Cause there will be an end. That’s for sure. For you, for me, for everybody. In business, as some like to say, it is not the journey that matters. It’s the destination. The journey is boring, sometimes frustrating and it means a lot of work so nobody really enjoys it or pays attention to it. All that is important is the end. Achieving the targets and getting the reward.

– But life is different. The end should not be important. Even if it is a happy end and you lived happily ever after with your loved one (or ones). Life is unpredictable and frustrating sometimes, but it has its own course for each of us. Nobody knows when it is the end so why giving a damn about it? Nobody will reward you with anything at that point and even if it does, you are not there to enjoy it anyway. You will not care.

Winter…spring…and the cycle goes on…with or without us.So why not just enjoying the journey? Together, as a couple? Or as a single person. Whatever…why not just BE? Why not just love another with all your heart and soul and not worry about the end? Why not loving you? Just you?! It is going to get cold and darker and winter will still take us by surprise anyway. So why not just living?

– My guess is…because not all of us can. We are not built this way. It doesn’t come natural. Yes, we can keep the light on longer and make it warm, but at some point someone has to pay for it anyway. So does the investment worth?

– Not really, but it’s definitely better than staying outside in the cold.”

The girl with dark brown eyes smiled at me, covered her ears with a beautiful, warm wool scarf and left.

The night was still young.

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Loveheimer

 

THE WILD WED ROSE

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After a long and not so easy journey done to find her inner happiness and heal after a very nasty breakup, the girl with dark “chocolate” eyes- the main character of my first two books (“The Land of my Naked SOUL” and “SEX heals?”) confronts herself with the idea of MARRIAGE.
To do or not to do? That is the question!
Living in a period of time when her independent, strong and extremely wild, powerful spirit brought her so much happiness, freedom and independence as a mother and woman, but so much “troubled” waters when it came to the relationship with the only man she ever loved with all her heart, the old concept of marriage seems to be a dangerous, unknown and yet mysterious, intriguing territory for her soul. But the Universe is challenging her. AGAIN.
Will she manage to face this challenge? Will she be able to adjust to the idea of belonging to this world? The “wives” world?

THE WILD WED ROSE by Loveheimer

I feel so happy and proud today to share with you, my friends, family and readers the cover of my new book which will be published soon and available for sale on amazon.
Stay tuned and keep on loving! 😍

Note from the author: I dedicate this book to my beloved and wonderful daughter, the essence, engine and love of my life. You inspired me to reach for more! I hope this book will also inspire you in your own future journey through life as a strong and amazing woman I am sure you will be.
Mama will always love you!

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Blink ONCE!

I am possessive… when I am in love, I am possessive, and I am not ashamed to say it loud and clear. I don’t care what guys might think about that, how scary that sounds and I definitely won’t feel guilty for that. We all get crazy when we fall in love, therefore the expression “I am crazy about you”,  and while that might be tricky, making us feeling jealous from time to time (which is healthy by the way), I believe that there are some basic rules in relationships that need to be respected and sharing the man I am with is none of that when it comes to me. You see, we all have a devil inside of us and we all like to give in to getting pleasure and pleasing our ego and desperate need to be wanted and liked by everybody, but in the equation “you are now mine…don’t like to share”, when it comes to me, that’s real. Breaking that rule is a deal breaker.

The moment I just SMELLED you might be fooling around, I’m out. And trust me. I will SMELL your BS. Oh dude… you will think I went to a “clairvoyant” or something, that well I am going to describe what I think you’ve done while I was “sleeping”. You know… those seconds when you will dare to think “I got her, I can do whatever I wanna do. She is too vulnerable right now to make something stupid like… leaving me!”. Oh man, you have no idea how fast I will disappear. You will have the impression that being with me was just a dream. That fast I will vanish from your life.

Sometimes I might first go silent and then just inform you smiling about my decision to leave your lying ass, without explaining why. Or, depending on my mood, I might give you the chance to offer an explanation, but if you take that for granted, and my kindness as weakness, you might say that… hmm… how can I say it nice? Let’s see… hmm… well… you’re fucked! Basically, you are fucked and expect nothing less than to see how the fire you were able to bring in me turns into a storm, you’ll almost get deaf because of my wild, mad roar and then, when I will be finally done with you, I will get ice cold. STONE ICE. But hey, that’s just me… the sea has plenty of other fishes… I am a LEO. A LEO WOMAN! 🙂

by Loveheimer

P.S. I dedicate this song to all my female readers asking themselves questions like: should I go or should I stay? You’ve landed on my blog, so the answer is… YOU… CHOOSE YOU… you are a smart girl so just do it: GO! Learn how to respect yourself, say to him “Thank you for the opportunity to share you with others, I am flattered, but I think I will pass” and get the hell out of there. Not because he doesn’t deserve you or whatever motivational BS you might read online, about you deserving better or whatever…. you might…. but one real reason why you should leave him is your own self-respect. I mean, if you don’t respect yourself, why the hell should he? That’s the real definition of love and trust me, he knows it. Men know it. Their entire being revolves around the word RESPECT! That’s how they define LOVE. So why shouldn’t you do the same?

Reading hearts

“Turn your magic on, to me she’d say
Everything you want’s a dream away
We are legends, every day…” (
Coldplay-Adventure of a Lifetime)

“It nourishes us, it nourishes our soul…. I don’t think I go too far when I say that it validates our human being in a “I AM” type of way. A “once I existed thanks to YOU… once, I was THERE because of YOU… once, my heart felt alive with you” kind of way. The memory of that love found its place in one corner of our hearts and from time to time we just want to open that chapter to read it again, to feel our hearts beating again, but not to stay… that’s why we do it. Not for the ego. It’s not the ego which is hungry. It’s the heart which needs that beat to continue to give us life on a daily basis. And I am telling you that I am no exception to that rule…I loved a man with all my heart, body and soul. And then another. And then another… the heart has an amazing capacity to give if we leave its windows open… you just have to know WHEN to open them…”

She wanted to add something, but then she stopped… I could tell by the way she was looking that her big, dark chocolate eyes were looking now inside of her and not outside of the window. It was a beautiful, warm, sunny autumn day. A day to remember…

“What happened with all those men you loved?”

Silence. Her soul was silent. It felt like the time stopped for a while and I had no idea how to handle the moment. I had the weird feeling that I hear my own heart beating. That silent she got. After a while, she looked into my eyes , and with the most beautiful, kind smile ever she said:

“They all left the building… came in a big rush by the door, stayed for a while, but then they went out on the back door… except those two. They stayed. We wrote the chapters, we closed them, but they never really left and I never really kicked them out either. And from time to time they come back, they open that book and invite me to read few pages together with them. I smile at them and I accept to do that. Why? I don’t know… because I like it? Because I love the sweet taste of the memory of the love we shared? Their energy…?! Mind, body… soul. I enjoy to give in to those few seconds, minutes of remembering us the way we were… the way I was. Reading them makes me feel and breathe again… makes me aware of my own human being, of my soul… and just for a second it makes me dream again… it makes my heart beat again. The magic is ON!”

By Loveheimer

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